If you can't get her name right, you can't get her number.
I don't care if her name is super-hard to pronounce, like Xochitl.
The Shallow Man was in Paris recently, and while sat outside one of my favorite cafes, was sat next to a table of American girls, one of whom spent most of the time discussing very loudly about whether or not some guy she’d been out with a couple of times was interested in her or not.
Now if that had been a Dutch girl, she’d have jumped that poor mans bones or got rid of him in no time at all, which brings me to the subject of today’s post, 5 differences between Dutch and American girls.
For the purposes of this post I will of course generalise (somewhat) and I’ll focus on the middle classes ladies of both countries of whom I know well.
This post might be upsetting to some, and if as a result I’m rounded up by a group of American girls, and dragged handcuffed and blindfolded to Starbucks and am forced to drink overpriced Chai Tea, followed by a skinny latte and then made to sit through every episode of Modern Family, with an icy demeanour I’ll shout at my detractors “Fat is NOT a feminist issue, eat less and get some exercise.”When the Dutch marry, they’ll often marry during the week to keep the costs down and make it a small affair with close friends and family.
Providing presents is usually optional but not expected.
American girls tend to view marriage as: When an American girl is going to marry, she’ll invite five hundred close friends and will spend weeks deciding who should sit where and next to whom.
The wedding has to be the biggest and the best of all time, and she’ll happily go into debt to tell the world, “I’ve got the right man” Americans in general have the bloody cheek to create a wedding list of overpriced household appliances and other goodies, even being kind enough to list the shops where you can buy the items.
Depending on which item on the list you choose will determine if you get ringside seats at the reception, or end up being seated close to the toilet on a table with their great uncle who emigrated to the USA from Germany in July 1945.
So get ready to learn everyone's birthdays, anniversaries, and ovulation schedules. Don't spit in your girlfriend's grandmother's face.9. Introduce her as your [insert ethnicity here] girlfriend.